Many women experience conflicting emotions when they commit to becoming a working mum. You are not the only one!
Here’s what’s happening with you and the top four things that can help you deal with it.
Conflict areas, bringing you inner turmoil
- Career and identity is often an important reason to keep on working. You might have worked hard to establish your career credentials and might be loath to lose your seniority and reputation. Taking a part-time or alternative option may seem like a sensible move but you might resist losing your financial independence and hard-won position.
- Money is needed to support the family expenditure, but you realize maintaining a job often requires extra expenditure. Childcare, hasty food shopping, expensive treats to compensate, and the clothes and expenditure required to maintain the desired image for a work environment are all additional costs you incur.
- Time is the big challenge for the working mum. Satisfying the demands of a job, family, partner and personal life are almost impossible, especially in the early pre-school days. You could feel the pressure to prove that you are committed and good at your job. Some women, however find that this results in other areas of their life becoming stressed and rushed.
It helps to know these conflict areas exist, and you are certainly not the only one experiencing them. For many women they are a source of guilt.
Top four things to do to make your life as a working mum easier
Apart from being aware of these conflict areas, you can also do a few things to make life as a working mum easier.
1. Remember: you need to be happy.
A satisfied mother is far better than one who feels resentful about her decisions. Many situations in life require elements of compromise. When you find that you are doing what is right for you, you could find you feel https://imagineear.com/pharmacy/generic-levitra/ happier as well when you are spending time with your children. Spend plenty of time finding good quality childcare.
2. Good quality childcare can help you feel positive about your children’s care and support.
Feeling confident that your children are well looked after is essential. Childcare can also bring benefits. Mixing with other children in a nursery or at a childminders’ teaches sharing, becoming more confident with others and often improves a child’s education and readiness for school.
3. Commit quality time to the family.
It is important to do this and value it highly. Ensure that regular time is allocated to spend reading with children, playing games and going for walks. These are far more important than expensive gifts and lavish treats. Children are adaptable. When they feel loved and important they settle.
4. Arrange help.
Help is essential. If your partner is unavailable perhaps you could find trustworthy grandparents, other mothers or neighbours who can provide overnight support occasionally. This provides a little personal time to relax, let go of stress and do fun things for yourself.
A working mum is often trying to have the best of both worlds. This requires planning ahead, being highly organised and having emergency back-up for when things don’t go to plan. If you feel that being a mother is only one part of your identity, you may find that you would like to maintain your pre-children role as much as you can. That way you become a more satisfied person and better able to modify your inner conflict.
Author: Susan Leigh is a Counsellor and Hypnotherapist who helps women and working mothers to feel better about their decisions, become more confident, assertive and positive about their needs and as such, improve their quality of life. She will happily give you further help, advice and has some great articles on her site lifestyletherapy.
0 Comments